Our Blog

It’s summer, which means more time with my kids. I have so much gratitude for this time, especially the little moments—unburdened by pretense or expectations of grandeur. The other day, I was playing this three-dimensional tic-tac-toe game with my eldest daughter, and she was beating...

April 17, 2019Begin Again…

Begin again… Spring is finally starting to feel like it’s here. We’ve had such a wet winter, so it means the flowers are in bloom, the grass is green, and Sacramento is bursting with color, vibrancy, and life. April is such a significant month for...

This morning as I was leaving for work, I got a text message from some mothers at my daughters’ school. It was a sweet text message chain asking who was available this weekday morning to do a playdate. I declined because of work and had...

August 9, 2017That Loving Feeling

I am reading Sharon Salzberg’s new book Real Love. I resonated with one of her stories and I thought I’d share it here. She writes that in 1976, shortly after co-founding the Insight Meditation Society, she decided to do a monthlong, self-guided retreat focused on lovingkindness...

A beloved client recently suggested that I listen to the above episode of the podcast Invisibilia (if the embedded player isn’t working, try refreshing the page, and if that doesn’t work, you can listen here). I’m so glad he recommended it. One of my favorite experiences as a human...

It’s a few days into 2017 and I’ve been in several conversations about New Year’s resolutions this week.  The prevailing sentiment? “I don’t set those any more. Resolutions are made to be broken and I just end up feeling bad about myself.” Now, I’m all...

“I WANT A BANANA NOW!!!” my five-year-old shouts over and over, as both my partner and I race around the house, trying to get breakfast ready, teeth brushed, vitamins taken, shoes on, etc. These busy mornings are perhaps the worst. Everyone is tired, rushing, and...

I’m often asked, “Do you know any books I can read that will help?” and I always smile with a sense of kinship. When I was 16, I had long hair, sometimes died purple, and I spent many a lunch hour in the high school...

I’ve ended with a few long-term therapy clients over the past few weeks, and it’s left me in a reflective mode. It’s a strange and powerful relationship we form in therapy. I spend months or years with these beautiful human beings–struggling, being, crying, growing, laughing, clashing,...

Distressed-man

March 9, 2016Self-Compassion Break

This morning, I was listening to an interview with Kelly McGonigal about working with clients who are stuck, and I had one of those moments where process and content collided. I watched as a very old process moved through me–a process where I was stuck...

As the father of two devoted fans of the movie “Frozen,” my home is often ringing with these three inspiring words–“Let it goooooooo!” The other day, as my four-year-old was belting them out, her soul unrestrained by oppressive conventions such as “singing in key,” I...

If you’ve never heard of Brene Brown, please stop reading this and immediately google and watch her TED Talks. If there is one researcher that has data that we as culture need to hear, I believe it’s her. One of the most compelling aspects of...

Well, folks, summer is here in full force in the Sacramento Valley, and it is hot. It’s about this time of year when that old Lovin’ Spoonful song starts banging through my head. You know the one: “Hot town, summer in the city. Back of...

Complementing Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy with Mindful Self-Compassion Training, A Three-Part Series Over the past several years, I have been focusing my growth as a psychologist on training in two areas: 1) Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and 2) Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC). At first glance, these...

Complementing Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy with Mindful Self-Compassion Training, A Three-Part Series As I wrote in the first part in this series, I believe that Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC) and Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) are congruent approaches to healing, largely because they both work within...

Complementing Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy with Mindful Self-Compassion Training, A Three-Part Series I personally feel tremendous gratitude for what MSC has offered me as a couples therapist. Anyone who practices couples therapy knows that it isn’t for the faint of heart. It is rewarding, but...